Slutty Sister Screwed For 1st Time

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I said “No” to which he replied that one of the group had found my mobile phone which he said I must have dropped at some stage. “Yeah, right” I said, “You mean one of you bastards lifted it from my bag” “Don’t be like that” he said “I’ve agreed with the others to make sure it gets back to you” His manner was very friendly and apologetic towards me and I thought maybe I was being a little harsh so I said I was sorry and asked him how he was going to get it to me. He already knew from our conversation at the dinner table roughly where I lived – rather stupidly I had let this slip at some stage in the conversation – and he said that it was no trouble bringing it round to me as he was already in the area. Can you believe that I just gave him my address? How could I be so idiotic? Ten minutes later when he arrived on the doorstep I was ready for him and had decided to bluff by inviting him in to say hello to Ken (who of course wasn’t there) I thought that this would put paid to any. " Yeah. Hmmm... Greg, we're not going to need anywhere near ten." Oh, I know. Just eight." I have my doubts." Huh?" Well, Mark and your neighbour there. One, right?" Oh, I see. Yeah, I guess." And... Hey, I want some of that pork." This one, Millie?" Yeah. And... ahem... lean closer." What?" Those two from the back of your car." What about them?" Well, you get any vibes?" Oh, you mean..." Yeah, well, don't you think?" Yeah, I guess so. I get the impression they've been on each other's radar for some time. Hey, could we have some more soy sauce here please?" Soy sauce? Yuck. Yeah, I thought so." Don't you know that girl?" Yeah, kinda. And the other two?" Well, I don't know them." No, but Greg, are they going to?" Oh. Well, look at them." Yeah." I think so." I know so." How do you know?" I'm a girl, Greg." I see that." Yeah. And so I just know." Oh." Okay, so here's my point. See if I can get this out before I finish my rice. We're not exactly sober, right?" Hell, no." But we are.
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The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said, "I can't understand how you can be so much bigger than me.We're the same age; we were the same size as kids. I just don't get it." Well," said the big Croc, "what have you been eating?" Politicians, same as you," replied the small Croc."Hmm. Well, where do you catch them?" Down the other side of the swamp near the parking lot by the Capitol." Same here. Hmm. How do you catch them?" Well, I crawl up under one of their Lexus cars and wait for one to unlock the car door. Then I jump out, grab them by the leg, shake the shit out of them and eat 'em!" Ah!" says the big Crocodile, "I think I see your problem. You're not getting any real nourishment. You see, by the time you finish shaking the shit out of a politician, there's nothing left but an asshole and a briefcase."The Difference between Grandpa and Grandma Have you ever wondered what the difference is between Grandmothers and Grandfathers? Well, here it is:There was this loving.

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